Happy Unofficial Birthday!

Today ya’ll, today we beat the pants off of RAD/FAS.  Today we were awesome! That really isn’t the case very often when it comes to handling Tanner.  We daily feel as though we are failing and in a survival mode with him.  Not today.

You see, Tanner’s birthday is December 27.  Yes, a measly two days past Christmas.  Oh my…… Every year that Tanner has been part of our family we have tried to celebrate with him.  We combined his birthday with Andy’s one year hoping it would help the overstimulation, we’ve tried a simple at home no frills celebration, we’ve tried it all….mostly.  It doesn’t seem to matter.  By December 27 every year, Tanner is beat down by overstimulation.  He absolutely cannot cope anymore and it shows in his constant behavior issues.

This has broken my heart for him.  You see, Tanner adores birthdays and singing Happy Birthday to any and everyone.  Yet, he’s never been able to enjoy his own birthday.

Until today.


This morning I had him help me to make his blanket.  I had bought some Olaf fleece and some really snuggly white fleece, and we made a tie blanket together.  He loved the one on one time, and he LOVES Olaf.


He was pretty stoked about it, and he kept telling everyone he “helps mommy for birthday.”


Of course he had to chase Andy down and show it off.

After we finished the blanket we loaded them all in the van and headed for town.  We took them on a family date instead of the mom date.  It seemed like it might go better for him and it did.  We took them all to the “dollar theater” to see Minions (but it cost us $2 a piece…inflation).  Oh we visited the animal shelter to cheer up the dogs, we love to do that.  The pace of the day moved along nicely so that he couldn’t dwell on what was happening so much that he had time to regress and act out…to bad (only very mild stuff).  We took all of the kids to the toy store and walked around for an hour, came home with a train table.  Tanner has very few things that he can play with that doesn’t cause him to lose attention quickly and then act out, or that he doesn’t destroy.  I hope this is a thing he will actually play with.

He wanted doughnuts instead of cake lol.  We got home just in time to have doughnuts and dinner before bed! Perfect timing I tell ya.


Today my son finally enjoyed his birthday for the first time….so what if it wasn’t his “actual” birthday.  Unofficial birthdays ROCK!…..Take that FAS/RAD!

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