Dear Adoption Critic

I see you sitting there behind your screen, mouth agape, standing in disbelief of some of the heinous atrocities that have hit the news recently pertaining to adopted children.  To clarify, I’m right there with you friend.  My mouth has stood open as I tried to comprehend just how awful some people can be.

You furiously write  out your replies with criticism of all adoptions in response to your emotions towards the actions of just a few.  There is no justification for what has been done to some children adopted into homes of abusive parents.  They are not however, the majority.

Adoption critic, you write that people should not be allowed to adopt “stolen babies.”  Hey, I’m on the same page with you again.  However, there are 147 million orphans in the world.  That number does not describe 147 million people who have been stolen from their parents.  That number describes the lonely, unloved, overburdened, and poor.  The neglected are within that number, the malnourished, the sick, they are all included in that number. 

You write that children should be supported within their families rather than being adopted out.  I agree with you, but what you fail to address is that there are many orphans out there without actual living relatives.  There are orphans out there whose family members do not want to keep them due to their child having special needs.  Should those orphans be ignored, left in orphanages to be neglected, tied to beds, starved? 

Your comments are out there, stating that adopting a child of a different race or with special needs is a fad.  You say that people are doing it to have an accessory or to gather attention.  Well, as an adoptive parent of two children with special needs, let me tell you that the task is no light job.  Adopting any child for attention or as a “fad” is completely ridiculous.  These are human beings, these are precious lives for which we take on the responsibility of caring for, enriching, teaching, guiding, loving, and helping to heal.  Parenting is a very serious job, the most important job there is, for without good parenting there will be a society of adults running the world who are without a good foundation. 

I have read your comments, adoption critic.  You claim to be Christian, but you criticize the family member adopting a child with special needs.  You say the child will burden the family, they will bring talk from people in the community, you say that the family doesn’t need to bring that kind of person around the children they have.  I don’t understand, are we (as fellow Christians) not commanded to love others before thy self.  I have not read in the Bible that we should sit back, watch those suffering, and just say a little prayer.  Oh, I believe in the power of prayer, but I also believe in the power of God to use His children to change the world.

 If not us…then who? 

If not now…when? 

You adoption critic sit there, not being Christian, giving your criticism towards those who are trying to actually care for the orphans of the world.  We are not comfortable to sit by and just watch the suffering suffer.  No, we cannot save them all, but why criticize us for saving the ones we can?  My family does support children in third world countries who are currently living with their relatives, we support children in our own community who are struggling, so why is it wrong that we should also support the child who doesn’t have anyone to hold them when they are sick?  Why is it wrong to support the child who doesn’t have a mother to comfort them when they have a bad dream? 

I read your comments about how tacky it is to fundraise for an adoption.  How if a person wants to adopt they need to have that $30,000 up front.  Well, I have plenty to care for my children, and can absolutely care for another, but no I do not seem to just have tens of thousands of dollars laying around.  I just don’t.  However, if the community of caring come together to support the saving of another orphan financially, and I take on the responsibility of parenting that orphan, is that so bad? 

Adoption doesn’t have to cost a thing.  Those are your comments, critic, written to promote foster care adoption.  I absolutely agree with that, and I support foster care adoption 100%.  However, we were told that our family doesn’t look desirable to social workers looking for families.  We are not older with teenagers or no children in the home.  I can’t fix that, but does that mean that a little girl across the world should die without a mother?  Is she of less importance than the children in this country?  I believe they ALL deserve love and care.  The orphan crisis is everywhere, it affects all nations, it is a sad problem for the world to solve.

You see adoption critic, it is not enough to throw money and criticism at a problem.  At some point someone has to get up and CHANGE the problem.  There are 147 million orphans in the world, some people see those orphans as human beings who matter.  Yes, there are bad people in the world.  That doesn’t mean that we should let those 147 million go on without a family, without love, without a chance of escaping the destitute circumstances with which they are currently in. 

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